Contradicting your partner in front of the kids

What to do right now

You disagreed with what your partner just did or said, and your child saw it. The split is now visible. Don't compound it — hold the current position, even if it's not your preference. "Okay, what Dad said stands. We can talk about it later." Later means later. After the kids are in bed, not after dinner.

What your brain just did

Your body

You reacted before you could coordinate with your partner. The words were out before you processed that they'd already set a boundary.

Your brain

ADHD impulsivity applies to disagreement too. Your brain registered something that felt wrong in your partner's approach and responded before the executive function system could weigh the context. The impulse to correct felt more urgent than the need for a united front.

What this did

Your child just learned the boundary has a gap. Two adults disagreeing in front of a child about rules gives the child a negotiation opportunity that undermines both of you. Discuss it privately, then present one position.